8 interesting facts about men and women that you didn't know

1. It only takes 1/5 of a second to fall in love with someone

Research published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2010 showed that when you see someone you're attracted to, the chemical reaction in your brain that produces euphoria begins immediately, and this process only takes 1/5 of a second. Brain scans show that 12 areas of the brain become active when a person feels love. When you look at or just think about the person you love, these areas begin to secrete a host of neurotransmitters throughout the brain, including dopamine, angiotensin, adrenaline, oxytocin, and more. These reactions are the same as those that occur in your brain when you receive a small dose of cocaine. Love is really poison.

2. Can love and sex really be separated?

Another large-scale analysis, published in 2012 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, attempted to identify differences in the neural pathways underlying love and sexual desire and found both overlap and differences between the two. Love and sexual desire activate strikingly similar networks and pathways in the brain, focusing primarily on areas of emotion, excitement, and higher thought. The author believes that sexual desire is not just a basic animal instinct of human beings, but involves the desire to achieve goals and higher-level thinking activities. Love is based on these mental activities, but it is higher than sexual desire. When love arises, the striatum is activated, but sexual desire does not activate the striatum. The striatum is an area that balances the lower and higher functions of the brain. Therefore, love is higher than sexual desire.

3. Kissing is really good for you

Two studies published in the journal Human Nature in 2013 both found that kissing isn't just about generating sexual excitement; it actually helps us choose partners and maintain long-term intimate relationships. The study found that both sexes viewed kissing as a very important indicator of whether they would get along well with a new partner. But kissing is not only crucial for starting a new relationship, it is also very important for maintaining a relationship or marriage. Both studies found that the amount of kissing between long-term couples was positively correlated with marital quality. This has no positive correlation with the frequency of sexual intercourse. Therefore, kissing is more important than sex to maintain a relationship.

4. Husbands and wives really do look more and more alike as they grow older

A large study in 1987 found that after 25 years of being together, couples start to look more and more alike. They asked 110 participants to look at photos of newlyweds and then at photos taken 25 years later and judge their facial similarities. This study eliminated all possible interference factors, such as only allowing people to see their faces and covering their hair and bodies. The results showed that after 25 years of living together, the couple's faces did look more and more alike. The possible reasons are the same diet structure, living environment, similar personalities, and the empathy effect produced by long-term interaction.

5. Long-distance relationships can also be maintained

People always think that long-distance relationships can’t last long. But a 2013 study published in the journal Communication shows that long-distance relationships can still maintain passion and love. Studies have found that couples in long-distance relationships may trust each other more and even feel closer than couples who spend time together every day. Two factors determine success or failure. 1. Tell the other person more personal and intimate things; 2. Whether to maintain the perfect imagination of "distance creates beauty" towards the other person. By achieving these two points, these long-distance couples can achieve the same level of satisfaction and stability as couples who spend time together day and night.

6. Four things that can ruin love

John Gottman, American psychology professor

The study followed couples for more than a decade, trying to find out what makes a happy marriage. He has found four things that can quickly ruin a marriage. Once a couple frequently encounters these four communication problems, they usually end up in divorce after six years. 1. Frequently criticize the other party. Especially deeply hurtful criticism of the other person's nature, such as personality or character. For example, “You’re late again because you don’t care about me at all.” This can cause the other person to feel hurt that they are inherently not good enough. 2. Contempt. When lovers begin to despise each other, breakup is not far away. Contempt includes sarcasm, name calling, eye rolling, etc.

3. Being too self-protective. If a person always makes excuses for his or her mistakes, or even always puts the blame on the other person, a breakup is not far away. After all, a marriage is a long-term partnership where the parties hope to support each other throughout their long lives. Life is not easy, and if you are always attacked at home, your marriage will not last long. 4. Cold War. When you close your heart, cut off communication, put yourself behind a wall, and go into cold war. The result of this can only be that the relationship will get worse and worse, and finally lead to a breakup.

7. Modern marriage places more emphasis on self-satisfaction and self-realization

A 2013 study showed that modern marriages are no longer the same as they were in the past. In the past, marriages were usually relationships that provided a sense of security and stability, but people in modern marriages are more looking forward to a stable relationship that can bring them self-realization and self-satisfaction. The study found that many couples do not invest enough time and effort to meet this expectation. The author says: If you want your marriage to help you achieve self-realization and personal growth, you need to invest enough time and energy to maintain the marriage. If you know you don't have enough time and energy, it's best to adjust your expectations and lower your standards for disappointment.

8. Some simple actions may save your marriage

If a relationship starts to cool or deteriorate, maybe don't rush to see a marriage counselor. Some simple actions may be able to turn things around. For example, watching a movie together. A study published in the American Journal of Psychology in 2013 found that after three years of follow-up, if couples go to see a romantic movie together and discuss it after watching, the divorce rate is reduced by more than half. The authors say: The results show that couples generally know what they or their partner are doing wrong and what they are doing right in their marriage. You don't need to tell couples this or that marriage technique, you just need to get them to think about what they have done recently. They tracked couples for three years and found that watching five movies together could reduce the divorce rate by more than half. So, let’s go to the cinema together when we have time.