4 things to note when dating in summer

4 things to note when dating in summer

For humans, every season is restless. People with excess hormones rush onto TV and go on blind dates in front of the whole world, and even more people choose to rush to the streets to chat up the opposite sex. The belief that "you get what you sow" doesn't work in unreasonable love. Fortunately, love is unreasonable but scientific.

Next time before you chat up a girl and say “papaya cannot make your breasts bigger” or chat up a boy and say “cola does not kill sperm”, you should pay attention to the following 4 points. This is the real advantage of scientific youth in love.



Make his heart beat

First, a classic case in psychology. Back in the 1870s, psychologists Donald Dutton and Arthur Aron wanted to see whether "the occurrence of sexual attraction would be increased under states of intense emotion." For this study, they set up two sets of experiments. In the first group, an attractive female experimenter stood in the middle of the "fear-arousing suspension bridge"; in the second group, the girls stood in the middle of the "non-fear-arousing suspension bridge". The instructions are the same for each scenario. As the male subjects walked by, they asked them to a) fill out a questionnaire, or b) describe a picture of a woman with her face covered, and then make up a story behind the picture. In addition, they told the male subjects that they would be happy to discuss the study with them in the evening if they had any questions, and gave them a piece of paper with their phone number.

Dutton and Allen found that 50% of the male subjects in the "fear-arousing suspension bridge" group called the experimenter, while only 12.5% ​​of the male subjects in the "non-fear-arousing suspension bridge" group called the experimenter. In addition, the first group of participants were more likely to tell the story from a sexual perspective than the second group. So if you feel nervous talking to a special someone, do something that gets your nerves excited first and tricks your brain into thinking that it's not them who's making you nervous.



Give him warmth

The second point comes from John Bargh, a Yale psychologist who specializes in priming. The priming effect is an implicit memory effect, which means that the previous one or more stimuli will affect the response to the next one or more stimuli. (For example: You answer a multiple-choice question that contains words that evoke the word "old," such as Florida, gray, and frail—and then you walk more slowly than someone who doesn't answer the question with those words.) In an experiment a few years ago, Bargh had subjects hold either a hot or cold drink and imagine that their confederate had a warm or cold personality. He found that subjects who were given a hot drink judged the confederate as enthusiastic, while those who were given a cold drink judged the confederate as cold. So, next time you go on a date, replace the ice cream in his hand with hot coffee.



Be careful of your period

Essentially, it can be said that men unconsciously detect a woman's menstrual period and lose sexual interest in her during this phase. Don’t think so? Let’s look at the data. In a 2006 study, Czech researchers found that men can tell whether a woman is menstruating by her sense of smell. The researchers collected odor samples from 12 women (by placing cotton pads under their armpits for 24 hours). The men were then asked to smell the cotton pads and rate the intensity and attractiveness of the scent. They found that the intensity of "post-menstrual and pre-ovulatory female odor" was lower and more attractive. In addition, a January 2011 study showed that when men and women judged photos of women's faces, women who took the photos in the days after their menstrual period but before their ovulation were more attractive than women who took the photos after their ovulation but before their menstrual period. In other words, a woman is most attractive just before she ovulates. So ladies, next time you're out and about, remember that guys can sniff out that you're on your period. And guys, if you think she is cool and cute, but feel like something is a little off, wait a few days and see.



With women

Psychologists Sarah E. Hill and David M. Buss of the University of Texas at Austin found that "women rated men more favorably when they were surrounded by women than when they were alone or with other men (a desirability gain effect). In contrast, men rated women more favorably when they were alone or with women than when they were surrounded by men." So how do you take advantage of this? If you're a woman, surround yourself with women. And if you are a man, then surround yourself with women. It's that simple.



On the one hand, the science of attraction is simple: We have an incentive to pass on our genes. But on the other hand, no one can explain other than this motive. It would be decades, at least, before psychology could even begin to understand attraction. But for now, just remember these 4 basic points:

Before you strike up a conversation, do something that stirs up your emotions and makes you feel excited. If there is no drawbridge nearby, do your best to find an alternative. Remember, physical warmth can make people feel the warmth of your personality. Paying attention to your period can have unconscious effects. The friends you surround yourself with influence your charm.

These findings all describe unconscious motivations, over which you have only a certain amount of control. But being able to use these methods to date is a great advantage for scientific youth and is worth making full use of.

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