8 tips for communicating about sex before sex

Before and after sex is not a good time to examine mistakes and analyze behavior; the bedroom or bed is not a good place to complain. Choose a pleasant, natural place to discuss it with your husband, such as a romantic restaurant with privacy.

1. Don’t bring it up in bed

Before and after sex is not a good time to examine mistakes and analyze behavior; the bedroom or bed is not a good place to complain. Choose a pleasant, natural place to discuss it with your husband, such as a romantic restaurant with privacy.

2. Plan the conversation

Speaking ill of your husband without thinking can easily cause resistance. You should calm down, organize your thoughts, and then communicate properly.

3. Reminisce about the good old days

When you two are reminiscing about the past, you can naturally bring up the topic of sex. You can say, "Remember when we used to kiss all the time? I miss that."

4. Don’t blame, don’t belittle

Start communicating in a way that is "psychologically acceptable". You could say, "We need to talk about our less-than-optimistic sex life, and I know you want me to feel happier, too. So, can we talk about how we can make it better?"

5. Say “I” more often

Make the conversation about yourself. For example, instead of saying, "You never give me enough foreplay," say, "I wish you had touched and hugged me more before that moment."

6. Use body language

Maybe there is no complaint in your words, but do your actions match your words? Don't cross your arms on your chest, sit next to him in a relaxed manner.

7. Set a solution and be honest with him

You need to tell him your needs and desires, but also understand him. Alternatively, you can go to psychotherapy together or improve your sex life by reading a book, etc.

8. This conversation cannot be a one-time thing.

Talking about sex life is not effective just once for the rest of your life; you need to talk about it frequently. Some couples set a day to tidy up their house or a day to do regular financial planning. Why not set a day to discuss how to improve the quality of sex?