Why women avoid having sex for the first time

Why do women often avoid their first sexual intercourse? I don't want to go into detail on this point because its meanings are complicated and can generally be explained as a manifestation of women's general "chastity". On the contrary, I believe that it is easier to solve the mystery of female frigidity by starting with certain pathological cases; some women become furious with men after their first intercourse - or even after every intercourse - and they swear at them, threaten them, or even actually beat them up.

There was a patient whom I analyzed in detail who was of this type. She loved her husband deeply, often sought sex with him, and really enjoyed it, but she still couldn't help hating him afterwards. I believe that this contradictory and erratic behavior is simply a variation of sexual frigidity, and most women of this type are simply frigid. The power of hatred in their hearts only silently suppresses their sexual passion, but never expresses it openly; however, pathological women distinguish between the two factors of love and hate, and express them one after another in a contradictory manner. Since violating a woman's virginity is bound to provoke her long-term hostility, her future husband naturally has reason to avoid doing so.

Through analysis, we understand some of the impulses hidden in women's hearts that cause this contradictory behavior; I think it can also be used to explain sexual frigidity. The first sexual intercourse arouses a lot of passion that is not natural to women, some of which will never appear again in subsequent sex. The first thing that escapes our minds is naturally the pain of not being able to bear the first rain and dew; perhaps, you immediately feel that this factor is sufficient and there is no need to look for anything else. However, physical pain alone cannot produce such serious consequences. We must also add the narcissistic psychological trauma caused by organ damage, which is often expressed as a sense of regret for the loss of noble virginity. The sacrificial rituals of primitive peoples tell us that neither pain nor regret should be overestimated.

We already know that their rituals are often divided into two parts: after the hymen is broken (by hand or some tool), it is followed by formal sexual intercourse, or a symbolic sexual intercourse posture, but the object is someone else instead of the husband. Therefore, we have reason to say that the purpose of this taboo ritual is not only to avoid the pain of the wedding night. What the husband wants to avoid is not only his wife's physical pain, but also something else.