Sexual fantasies serve many important functions. First, it guides us to find our sexual goals and provides a more vivid picture and specific content for our general sexual impulses. We fantasize about certain types of men or women, and as we fantasize, we feel their attraction grows stronger. However, the object of our fantasy may be illogical or unattainable, which is also one of the flaws of fantasy. We can imagine perfection, but it is hard to find perfect people in real life. Second, sexual fantasies prepare us for possible scenarios. Sexual fantasies are like a rehearsal, allowing us to rehearse in our minds how to respond to different scenarios. This way, we can be prepared for what might happen on a date, after a party, or in bed with our partner. Third, sexual fantasies allow us to escape from boring or heavy real-life environments. Monotonous or repetitive work often triggers fantasies in an attempt to escape boredom. Fourth, even when our sex life is very satisfying, we may still indulge in fantasies and bring novelty and excitement to the relationship. Fantasy provides a safe outlet for the curiosity in sexual instinct. Studies show that some women can orgasm through fantasy alone. Fifth, sexual fantasies can be expressive to a certain extent, just like dreams. Sexual fantasies reveal our existing interests, pleasures, anxieties, fears, or disorders. Because fantasies contain only a small fraction of the details of reality, the ones we choose are very important—they convey what we are feeling just below the surface of our consciousness. For example, fantasies about extramarital affairs may indicate a deep dissatisfaction with one's marriage, while fantasies about erectile dysfunction may convey a fear of sex or concerns about one's relationship with another. |
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