Trying to please because of guilt After all, an affair is a kind of hurt. When he returns to you, he will flatter you out of guilt. Although these are true expressions of his feelings, after all, they are not the whole truth. Men are aggressive animals, and only because of their aggressiveness can they radiate masculine vitality and bravery. If a man always deliberately suppresses his true nature, it means that he is also accumulating repression and forbearance, which will eventually explode completely one day. So, in this case, the wife might as well communicate frankly with her husband. Only after both parties are completely open can they re-establish trust and uninterrupted intimacy. Sex after an affair requires you to let go of your burdens and be relaxed. Only when you get rid of the guilt and the haze can your sex life regain its vitality and even become sweeter. After the affair ends, the man returns to his former lover on the surface due to various pressures, but as Jun'ichi Watanabe mentioned in "What Are Men": Many times, the reason why a man has an affair is because he cannot stand the life of a "masked couple". He went out to look for passion, and after experiencing the lightning-fast passion in his affair, he could no longer accept the sexual dullness of his married life. So when he is with you, he may still be lingering on the excitement and pleasure of having an affair. This will make many wives unbearable. In fact, the most taboo for wives at this time is to expose scars. What you need to do is to be tolerant and wait for the man to adjust himself and reflect. Your gentleness and kindness are the best lubricant to help him adjust. His sexual psychology becomes fragile and sensitive Men are extremely fragile animals. One man mentioned that once when he was having sex with his wife, his wife jokingly said that a certain man was much stronger than him, and he immediately couldn't hold it anymore. This kind of male sexual psychology has been confirmed by many experts, because men's sexuality is controlled by their psychological thoughts, and once they are distracted, they cannot disguise it. After the affair ends, he becomes fearful and cares more about your reaction and evaluation of him. A joking accusation will become an unbearable burden for him. Therefore, on the first night after an affair, avoid bringing up the past, and don't evaluate his performance in a sarcastic or cynical tone. You feel strange and awkward Before the affair, you were close, but after the affair, after going through a lot of psychological hardships, some subtle changes will occur in the relationship between husband and wife. At this time, two extreme situations will occur. One is getting back together and being like a newlywed after a long separation, because having rehearsed the scenario of "loss" once, you know that you really cannot lose each other, so you will have a stronger passion for possession; the other situation is that because of the psychological barrier, it is difficult for the couple to restore the past intimacy, and instead, there is unfamiliar politeness and restraint. The most important thing between husband and wife is naturalness. To regain that feeling of intimacy, you don't necessarily need actual sex. Reminiscing about the past, quietly hugging and caressing each other are all part of the process of moving from awkwardness to intimacy. |
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